ERTHMB Chapter 113

A Carelessly Given Apology

Eugene pointed with a sidelong glance at the cafe terrace right next to them. Helena hesitated, but unfortunately he was quite tall, and following his overall body proportions, his arms were long too.

Eugene pulled a chair from the terrace with his long arm, creating space to sit.

“How about sitting down, Helen.”

“I prefer to stand.”

Helena answered immediately, and Eugene responded without pause.

“Why, because it’s easier to run away again?”

His hazy eyes bore into Helena. Despite their pale saturation, they held a starkly naked depth. Helena swallowed the tingling in her throat and deliberately cleared her voice to sound firm.

“I never ran away.”

“You did run away.”

“No. You didn’t try to catch me.”

“You…”

Once again, Eugene’s quick retort failed to form a complete sentence and trailed off. However, he soon forced himself to finish his words.

“Because I thought you would come back.”

It was a precarious tone, as if it would shatter at the slightest touch.

Helena naturally furrowed her brow. She didn’t like how he looked at her with such a face on the verge of falling apart while his grip on her was so fierce.

This makes it seem like you’re not holding on but clinging. Like you’re pleading.

Helena tried to transform the sharp pain in one corner of her chest into a faint irritation before spitting out:

“Stop twisting your words. Whether I ran away or not, what business is it of yours?”

“You are… you are my wife, Helen. Everything you do has to be my business.”

Helena’s lips trembled. The words rising in her head were overflowing, but they wouldn’t push out past her lips.

Helena thought her own eyes had now become hazy. Eugene’s image, which hadn’t left her sight for even a moment since they faced each other, blurred.

“Please, Eugene.”

“Stop.”

“Eug-“

“Only say that much, Helena.”

Having cut off her words first, Eugene exhaled as if panting. Helena was the same, though not to that extent.

To make matters worse, moisture began seeping through the corners of her eyes. It was truly foolish and pathetic. With the thought of drying them away, she desperately fought back with her eyes wide open.

“You’re the one who should stop. I’m not the person your life needs.”

“Don’t make assumptions carelessly, Helen! After sharing all that time with me, do you really not know?”

“During all the time I spent with you, that’s the only thing I realized. You’re the one who still doesn’t know!”

She wanted to endure until the end, but thick moisture finally formed at the corners of her eyes. Helena hastily shook off Eugene’s hand and turned around.

But as soon as she took a step, she was caught again. This time it wasn’t just her arm—her whole body was caught.

Eugene embraced Helena from behind as if trapping her, murmuring:

“Don’t go.”

It was a body that moved like instinct before conscious thought, and words that burst out like a newborn’s first cry upon entering the world.

To Eugene, it was natural order and above all, a rightful request. A plea that should be naturally spoken and naturally accepted.

Unlike the woman who struggled as if it were the most arduous task in the world.

“Let go.”

“Don’t go, Helena.”

“I told you to let go.”

“If you promise you won’t run away anymore.”

Eugene tightened his embrace even more. His low, muffled voice swept across Helena’s earlobe.

Helena realized that no matter how much she twisted her body, she couldn’t escape from Eugene’s arms and stopped resisting. She placed her hands on the forearms wrapped around her waist and murmured in a heavy voice:

“…Eugene. Why are you doing this now?”

“…….”

The breath that had been hotly wetting Helena’s ear stopped for a moment. Helena rubbed Eugene’s stiff finger joints for an instant and repeated:

“Why only now?”

Eugene couldn’t exhale the breath he had held. He was just beginning now, yet her words that put a period to everything couldn’t be easily accepted. No, he didn’t want to acknowledge it.

But Eugene Evergale had to. Only then could he properly face Helena. Even if it was belated regret, it was the minimum qualification to hold onto her.

Helena no longer pushed Eugene away, but she didn’t turn around either as she continued speaking:

“It took me 15 years to abandon you, so wouldn’t those years be too pitiful? Why do you always make me into that kind of woman?”

“…15 years, what on earth are you talking about?”

“…It’s a story that’s too late for you to know. No matter what you do now, nothing can change. You know that too.”

“I don’t know.”

Eugene, who had reflexively spilled his inner thoughts, buried his head in Helena’s shoulder and hastily recited:

“I don’t know, so I’ll change. Just stay as you are.”

“I told you to stop. How long do you think the words you just spoke will last? A month? Six months? A year?”

“Until you’re satisfied.”

Helena turned her head to Eugene’s opposite side, avoiding him as much as possible even in her captured distance.

“No, no, Eugene. The person who should be satisfied will end up being you, not me. Do you want me to abandon myself again according to that taste of yours that only loves pitiful women? Carving and cutting and fitting me together until I suit your taste?”

Helena twisted her body again. This time Eugene obediently let her go.

As Helena said, holding on longer wouldn’t change anything. There are times to retreat and times when you must let go. And even in moments when nothing would change, there were necks that had to be bowed.

“…I’m sorry, Helena.”

Helena escaped from his embrace, but Eugene still didn’t let go of her wrist. Helena had no choice but to face him. Eugene bowed his head, grateful that she didn’t even brush that away.

“I’m sorry.”

Despite the considerable height difference, Helena could see the top of Eugene’s head. Helena bit and chewed her lower lip until it was mangled.

Because the scene unfolding before her eyes was so unfamiliar that she even felt as if she had fallen into another world for a moment.

Eugene Evergale was a man who had never once apologized to anyone.

His neck was always stiff like a willow trunk and never knew how to bend. It was so solid that even if a blade were thrust into it, the tip might bounce back instead.

He had been such an arrogant man. One who never knew how to look down. That man was asking for forgiveness.

Helena felt one corner of her suppressed chest begin to surge like waves carrying a paper boat.

“Don’t carelessly apologize to my life.”

“What I’ve only now learned, what I still don’t know. I’m sorry for everything.”

Eugene still didn’t raise his head. Instead of pulling or shaking her caught wrist, Helena commanded again:

“Let go, I said let go.”

Helena panted. Suddenly Eugene noticed that the back of his hand was getting wet.

A small droplet fell with a plop.

Is it raining? Eugene slowly raised his head over his cooling hand. Only then did he see the woman below him.

She was crying. Transparent streams slid down her cheeks.

They were clear tears, not the bloody tears he’d seen in dreams. Helena was resenting him instead of just cutting everything off and leaving. She was showing attachment.

Eugene was unspeakably happy about that. The corners of his mouth twisted and curled upward.

Even with a crying woman, his weeping wife before him, it happened that way.

Though he had become a worthless and insignificant man gasping over that single fragment of attachment, it didn’t matter at all. As long as Helena would stay by his side in any form.

Eugene raised his other hand that wasn’t holding her. He gently placed it on Helena’s cheek and softly stroked with his thumb.

“You’re… crying.”

Another stream of water trickled down. The hot tears were wiped away by Eugene’s touch before they could cool in the winter wind.

“You still like me. Then why don’t you hold onto me?”

Eugene cast his bait with a trembling voice.

Though he had thrown it out in self-mockery, Helena opened her mouth like a fish dropped in the desert. Helena, who swallowed her sob once, pushed against Eugene’s chest with all her might.

“Why should I do that? Why should I!”

“Helena.”

“Tell me you used to love me. Tell me you don’t love me now. Don’t look at me with those disgusting eyes and just say it!”

“…….”

Hazy golden eyes and moisture-filled blue eyes collided in mid-air.

The moment he met those precariously trembling blue pupils, Eugene’s lips curved even deeper. The twisted smile soon became distorted joy covering his face.

‘It’s not over yet.’

Helena couldn’t bear to look at Eugene anymore and squeezed her eyes shut while shouting:

“Please just, just leave me alone. I’m going crazy as it is, so please stop…!”

Helena didn’t finish her words, but Eugene somehow seemed to have heard the rest.

‘Let me give up on you.’

Even if it was an auditory hallucination his senses had forcibly fitted together because he heard what he wanted to hear, that was fine. His chest swelled with such joy that Eugene only followed with his gaze the retreating figure of the woman who turned and fled as if running away.

If only that bothersome fellow hadn’t suddenly interfered in front of him, his mood would have been good all day.

“What exactly remains if you act so despicably?”

Ian stood blocking Eugene’s path in case he might follow Helena. Ian pushed Eugene’s shoulder and warned heavily:

“Don’t hold onto her now. Don’t shake her either.”

Eugene let out a small laugh. Eugene was momentarily pleased even with Ian’s behavior. It was like proof that Helena had at least left him a place on the scale opposite to where that guy had climbed.

“Why, afraid she’ll waver?”

“I’m afraid she’ll get hurt more. I’m afraid that damn kind-hearted woman will hurt again. I’m afraid she’ll be unable to speak and comfort her rotting insides with tears alone because of you again!”

Now Eugene clearly laughed. It was a strange laugh filled to the brim with twisted ecstasy. For a moment it sounded like wind whistling through a cracked window.

Eugene, who had let out that eerie breath, soon composed his laughter and murmured:

“She still loves me, it seems, Helena does.”

Ian ground his teeth. He tried to restrain himself, but his efforts were in vain as his hand reached out.

“Is your love about causing pain?”

Eugene roughly brushed away Ian’s hand that gripped his collar.

“Whether it hurts or not, Helena will decide that.”

Eugene immediately turned and walked away from the city center with long strides.

Walter, who had been waiting for Eugene at the designated spot, spotted him and approached, following alongside him. Eugene kept his gaze fixed ahead and didn’t slow his pace as he spoke:

“You said the owner of the hotel where I’m staying is Garta Spencer.”

“That’s correct, but… do you have any orders?”

Eugene suddenly stopped short. Walter barely managed to put strength in his toes to avoid the mishap of bumping into him. To Walter, who inwardly sighed with relief, Eugene quietly commanded:

“Schedule some time. I have a conversation to share.”