GDTEA Chapter 76

Repayment

Sharti wandered back and forth through the alleys, collecting more purple poisonous herbs.

Just in case, she carefully examined the purple poisonous herbs that she had perfectly collected roots and all, wrapping them in cloth.

‘There’s no smell, and it’s not the type of poisonous herb that has adverse effects on the surroundings.’

The purple poisonous herb had particularly unusual roots.

Unlike the roots of ordinary grass, they were considerably long and had a shape covered with countless small granules. It looked as if frog eggs were stuck all over the roots.

‘Setting aside its flashiness, it looks somehow disgusting.’

The roots of the poisonous herb gave off a feeling that was disgusting beyond just being bizarre.

Sharti narrowed her eyes and slowly examined the poisonous herb once more. Rather than curiosity about the unfamiliar poisonous herb, she felt doubt.

‘There’s no way a poisonous herb growing in a village where people live wouldn’t be recorded anywhere.’

Sharti had studied herbs diligently to eliminate the disgusting burn scars. She had read countless books to find a way to fix her voice.

Finding ways to read books even without money wasn’t particularly difficult.

[Sha, I got it!]

[Doctor! This book! I brought it for you!]

She could obtain shared used books or get them for free from garbage disposal sites.

Thanks to Virena and Tein, Sharti had read truly many books.

Since she couldn’t show her face and walk around outside anyway, Sharti hid at home and devoted all her time to studying.

‘Because of herb combination methods, I learned even more about poisonous herbs.’

In fact, due to people’s perceptions, ordinary doctors generally avoided dealing with poisonous herbs unless absolutely necessary.

Patients of unlicensed doctors like Sharti didn’t particularly care about ingredients, so they could experiment with more various combinations to manufacture diverse medicines.

Above all, herbs were in high demand and expensive, while poisonous herbs were relatively cheap.

‘Of course, deadly poisons are expensive.’

Since poisonous herbs were difficult to handle, only finished products traded secretly commanded high prices.

‘Of course, I don’t know all the poisonous herbs in the Great Empire of Neweiton, but……’

The poisonous herb before her eyes was extraordinary.

Though she had handled or discovered various poisonous herbs many times before, this was the first time she felt such a dangerous signal.

‘Ah, should I ask grandmother?’

Vireta, who had traveled on many foreign commissions in her youth, might have seen it once.

Sharti wrapped the poisonous herb tightly in cloth and put it in her bag.

‘Ren will come looking.’

Dusting off her hands as she stood up, Sharti looked up at the sky to gauge the time. By now, Ren would probably have belatedly realized she had disappeared and would be searching for her.

She was still worried about the enthusiasm of the children who had been shouting about deer, but children of that age changed their interests several times a day, so their interest in such nonsense fairy tales would soon fade.

Sharti, who had paused in her steps, let out a soft laugh.

‘I only expected to wander around anxiously, never thought of this kind of situation.’

Who could have imagined that she would end up running away because favorable gazes made her embarrassed and shy?

In fact, it was because Sharti wasn’t being as cautious about her surroundings that she had the leisure to act this way.

‘They seemed to know little about the Kingdom of Krianet.’

After revealing her identity as a bastard of the Kingdom of Krianet before Ashu’s grandfather and the village chief, Sharti had unconsciously lowered her guard.

The hidden village, by its nature, had no interest in worldly affairs, and the fact that information was limited reassured Sharti.

“…….”

Sharti touched her face inside the hood.

Thanks to magic, the moment she had removed her hood and shown her face to people, Sharti had felt freedom. The sense of liberation when making eye contact with others without hiding anything was on a completely different level from the refreshment she felt when staying alone at home with her bare face.

The unobstructed view had presented her with a new world.

‘……Should I ask them to cast the magic just one more time?’

Before she knew it, Sharti was stroking the edge of her hood with hands full of regret.

The impulse to take it off kept trying to disturb her rational judgment.

[Everything started from you, Sha. Naturally, you should receive proper repayment.]

‘Repayment.’

Sharti chewed her lips.

Normally, she would have stopped imagining at this point, but today was different.

‘If I really have the qualifications to ask for something-.’

Human greed was frightening.

What she would normally have dismissed as an impossible, vain delusion gradually became clearer, and before she knew it, she was making plans in her head.

Clap-! Sharti grasped the last thread of reason and slapped both her cheeks loudly.

Ugh, with the stinging pain in her cheeks, Sharti suddenly came to her senses.

‘Greed has no end.’

If she became greedier here, she would surely face great misfortune.

People often said that misfortune comes in moments of happiness.

‘I can’t ask the mages either.’

If the magic suddenly wore off like last time, it would be terrible.

The hopeful greed that had swelled up disappeared in an instant, as it always had.

“I should be satisfied with my voice.”

Her face was a secret, but her voice wasn’t particularly a secret. She had just been hiding it out of unnecessary worry and self-consciousness.

Recently, through practice with Ren, the number of times she used her voice had increased. Though she worried the children might be frightened, she ultimately used her voice, and even when there were people around, she would lower her voice to talk with Ren.

She felt the anguish and sadness about her damaged throat gradually fading.

‘Maybe I won’t need to carry pen and paper.’

She would still be self-conscious and worry about others’ reactions, but she gradually gained hope and courage that things would get better.

[They’re not being harmed in any way, so why do you hurt yourself by putting yourself down?]

That one sentence from Ren hurt.

The wounds she thought no longer hurt because she had become accustomed to self-deprecation, self-blame, and giving up – the moment Ren recognized them, Sharti hurt for the first time in a long while.

Those wounds she had ignored even as they festered because she had become numb to them hurt again.

[You’re too precious a person to inflict such wounds on yourself.]

I’m also a precious person.

I’m also an ordinary person.

I’m also…… a person who feels pain.

“I’m also a living person.”

When the fire five years ago took away her ordinary voice, Sharti thought:

The dead have no words. That’s why it left such a terrible voice.

Live like the dead, saying nothing at all.

Even after becoming a doctor, her damaged voice never returned.

The dead could never come back to life.

“I’m also a person who can speak.”

Though it would take a long time before she could speak normally, Sharti could speak.

The dead have no words.

But Sharti wasn’t dead. She was a person properly alive and breathing.

“……I’m also a person who can change.”

Sharti took a deep breath. Then she lifted her head.

The sky visible between the alleys was narrow, high, and clear.

‘This far. Please just watch over me this far.’

Please overlook this degree of change.

Having lived as a dead person for the past five years, please overlook this change for just a brief moment.

Please allow just this small happiness to one who struggles desperately in misfortune.

“…….”

Sharti hoped that this prayer would reach heaven.

After organizing her thoughts, Sharti breathed out much more lightly and slowly emerged from the alley.

She deliberately ignored Ren’s smile that had come to mind during her prayer. Just as she was trying to take one step toward happiness, she couldn’t wish for greater happiness.

Because she couldn’t even fathom how great the misfortune at the end might be.

****

That evening, dozens of lantern-shaped magic devices brightly illuminated the village sky.

Though a bit early, they held a feast rivaling noble banquets, containing the meaning of celebrating the village’s new beginning.

Under the sky embroidered with crimson, the village residents, Magic Tower mages, and Krofl Mercenary Group gathered together.

“Though the Tower Master hasn’t arrived yet and the paperwork procedures aren’t finished, so it feels early, I prepared this thinking a toast would be necessary to express that we look forward to the days we’ll spend together.”

When the Deputy Tower Master raised his glass, Karun also laughed heartily and raised his glass.

“No need for a separate welcome ceremony.”

“I feel embarrassed to only be receiving.”

“What are you saying, Village Chief? You’re being too modest.”

Karun poured fruit wine into the village chief’s glass as he awkwardly turned his empty glass.

It was fruit wine from the south that the Krofl Mercenary Group was proud of.

“Yes. Wasn’t it thanks to Village Chief’s great decision to protect the village that we can coexist like this?”

At the Deputy Tower Master’s words, the village chief showed a slight smile.

Coexistence. What a wonderful sound that was.

“Well.”

However, the village chief knew shame.

The village chief was seeing the village evening look bright for the first time.

The hidden village went to sleep early in the evening. Even soft lamplight couldn’t be lit. That’s how they had lived. They had spent years in this village having to breathe quietly, soundlessly, even when breathing.

“I’m just a coward.”

Hadn’t he justified his cowardice as natural order and made cowardly threats instead of begging for life when the first hand was extended?

Karun and the Deputy Tower Master exchanged glances while watching the village chief’s bitter smile.

“Truly cowardly people don’t reveal that they’re cowards themselves.”

“Pardon?”

Karun refreshingly emptied his glass.

“They only make excuses for themselves continuously, to the end. They’re cowards who can’t even look back at their own sins.”

Living cowardly in an absurd world is such a convenient excuse. Doesn’t it blur guilt and justify wrong choices?

Therefore, acting righteously without being cowardly, keeping faith and protecting something, was truly difficult.

And those hearts that broke despite accomplishing such difficult things could find no strength to endure the world except by forming a mercenary group.

“Everyone makes mistakes. Sometimes they lie, sometimes they run away. Being imperfect creations of God, it can’t be helped.”

The Deputy Tower Master gently continued Karun’s words.

The sky’s light reflected in the fruit wine was truly beautiful. The Deputy Tower Master took a sip of the fragrant fruit wine. Mana had already seeped into the fruit wine, making him feel as if he were drinking wine made by God with just one sip.

“What’s important is whether you make efforts to correct mistakes or not, isn’t it?”

At the Tower Master’s words, the village chief drank with a sigh.

Even though the precious wine taste he was experiencing for the first time felt like it would burn his throat, the village chief emptied his glass completely.

“Effort…….”

The village chief stared at his empty glass, then offered it to Karun and the Deputy Tower Master.

“I have a request.”

The village chief thought of the woman with long honey-colored hair, pale and slender.

He also remembered shoulders that trembled finely despite trying not to shake, and lips full of small wounds from how much she had bitten them.

“I want to repay the benefactor who connected the village, mercenary group, and Magic Tower.”

Even to give one repayment, he had nothing, so with his strength alone he couldn’t do anything and was asking for help like this.

He was still weak and cowardly.

Still, the village chief hadn’t forgotten those deep red eyes that never wavered.

Looking at the village chief trying to change, both Karun and the Magic Tower Master readily nodded.

It was natural to give grateful repayment to the being who had helped them form connections.

“The Tower Master will gladly lend his strength.”

Later, as the Deputy Tower Master had confidently said, the Tower Master gladly agreed to provide repayment.

While presenting very generous and kind options for a Tower Master.

“The doctor’s throat, or the slave’s head. If you could fix one of the two, who would you choose?”